


✨💀💨🛡⚡✨

by Pyromaniacal



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Ficlet, Gen, I don't really have an explanation for this I just have brainrot, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), no beta we die like men, pitch revalink implied if we're gonna go full homestuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 00:09:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29958009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pyromaniacal/pseuds/Pyromaniacal
Summary: Link is having trouble mastering the Champions' abilities. Naturally, he opens a memo.
Kudos: 4





	✨💀💨🛡⚡✨

**Author's Note:**

> I adore writing in Pesterlog format, so I'm now going to proceed to do this for fandoms where it makes no logical sense whatsoever. Just pretend this is a "the spirits of the Champions hang out in Link's head" AU and he has Pesterchum in his brain or something, I dunno.
> 
> My headcanon chumhandles for the Champions are extremely creative and you should congratulate me for them. /s
> 
> Honest to god I don't know where this came from but it exists now so I might as well post it, because apparently I have no shame. It might be a bit rough - I haven't really edited it.

hatenoHero  [HH] opened memo on board ✨💀💨🛡⚡✨.  
hatenoHero  [HH] added acquaticGrace [AG], zephyrsUltimatum [ZU], rockinCorundum [RC], and chieftessThunder [CT] to memo.  
HH: ❓  
ZU: This is inane.  
zephyrsUltimatum  [ZU] has left the memo!  
CT: You get back here!  
chieftessThunder  [CT] has added zephyrsUltimatum  [ZU] to memo.  
RC: I HAVE TO ADMIT IM RATHER MYSTIFIED BY THE MEMO TITLE  
ZU: Oh, he clearly wants help with mastering our abilities, because he’s too incompetent to do it on his own.  
ZU: Like I said, this is inane.  
CT: Ignore him.  
AG: how can we help you link?  
HH: ✨✨➡️❓  
AG: you need help activating the powers?  
HH: ✅   
AG: well for me i always focus on being calm and serene  
AG: it might help to meditate!  
hatenoHero  [HH] has caught on fire.  
AG: maybe not near a bokoblin camp though  
CT: Ouch.  
CT: Focusing is a good idea, though. You need to focus on what you want to do and where you want to strike to channel effectively.  
CT: With practice, a skilled warrior can be astonishingly powerful.  
ZU: Yeah, well, Link isn’t exactly skilled.  
RC: HEY LAY OFF! LINKS ONE OF THE MOST POWERFUL WARRIORS HYRULES EVER SEEN  
AG: also the chosen hero!  
RC: YEAH!  
RC: LISTEN LITTLE GUY YOU GOTTA DIG DEEP INTO YOUR HEART  
RC: REALLY FEEL IT IN YOUR BONES  
RC: ITS ALL PASSION!  
ZU: That's what she said.  
CT: Ugh.  
AG: oh excuse me for interrupting  
AG: but are the emoji in the memo title meant to represent our powers?  
ZU: Obviously.  
AG: why am i the skull, link?  
AG: i’m supposed to *stop* you from dying!  
HH: 🧟  
AG: oh my goodness i promise it works better than that!  
HH: 🤔   
CT: Okay, so, meditation, focus, and passion seem like good places to start.  
CT: Anyone have anything else?  
HH: 🐦❓  
ZU: Hylia above, is that meant to be me?  
HH: ✅   
ZU: You are despicable. I’m not dignifying such an uncouth portrayal with an answer.  
CT: Oh, come on, birdbrain, give him some advice.  
CT: It’s not like you’re the one saving Hyrule.  
CT: You kinda missed the boat on that one.  
ZU: Wow, that was a low blow.  
HH: 😂  
ZU: Ugh.  
ZU: It takes extreme skill and the heart of a great warrior, neither of which you have.  
ZU: You’re pretty hopeless, for being Hyrule’s last hope.  
AG: dont say that!  
HH: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
ZU: If you have the proper training and dedication, and that’s a big if, the ability is merely a matter of technique.  
ZU: Focus and spirit and whatever the others said probably helps too.  
AG: in any case, link, we believe in you!  
RC: HELL YEAH!  
RC: GO BEAT GANONS FACE IN LITTLE BUDDY!  
CT: We’re all rooting for you.  
ZU: Because we’re out of other options.  
CT: Quiet, you.  
CT: Urbosa’s Fury is ready.  
chieftessThunder  [CT] has left the memo!  
AG: mipha’s grace is ready!  
acquaticGrace  [AG] has left the memo!  
RC: DARUKS PROTECTION IS READY TO ROLL!!  
rockinCorundum  [RC] has left the memo!  
ZU: Sigh.  
ZU: You better not screw this up.  
ZU: Revali’s Gale is now ready.  
zephyrsUlimatum  [ZU] has left the memo!  
hatenoHero  [HH] closed memo.

**Author's Note:**

> Minor/possibly irrelevant note: I haven't finished Age of Calamity yet, please don't spoil me in the comments, thanks.


End file.
